Let me tell you about that time I was born.

So I don't actually remember this pretty momentous day of my history.  Lucky for me, I've been told some stories!  You might be wondering why I introduced myself as Tyler David.  WELL! I stand corrected, I was supposed to be David Tyler.  It's a pretty awesome name. Especially for a boy, but the thing is, I was born a girl.  Glad we cleared that one up!  Well, the rents were pretty convinced I was a boy and they were a little confused when the Doc let them know it was not the case.  So David Tyler was out for a name.  J Bean was totally stoked!  "A little Lindsey!"

Today's story will be all about my hospital stay...days in which I remained nameless, and nights I was kidnapped from the nursery.
I know it has been speculated and questioned by many why I don't look like other members of my immediate family.  "Does your mom have red hair?" "No." "Does your dad have red hair?" "No." "Are you sure you two are really sisters?" "Yes."  There is not a whole lot of physical similarities that connect me with my sister or the little bro.  The J Bean and I have been watching a new show on ABC family called Switched At Birth, which got me to thinking...  MAYBE I WAS SWITCHED AT BIRTH TOO!!!!  But then I found this picture...

"Oh Hey Robyn!  I mean Dad?" It appears I could pass for my father's son.....

This lead me to the conclusion that I was probably not switched at birth.  I WAS however unaccounted for in the nursery for more than a few hours after my delivery.
My good Ol' Pops is not actually very good at following rules and regulations.  Seems we have more in common than just our rugged good looks.  In spite of the fact that he couldn't name me David Tyler or Tyler David he was pretty excited for my arrival.  He was also quite eager to get me back to my Momma where he thought I belonged.  Back in the "olden" days after a C-section Mom went to recover and rest while Baby was sent away to the nursery.  Maybe I looked hungry or bored in the nursery...  I don't really know.  But he did a little grab and go.  Took me back to the Momma's room.  There were some cute bonding moments.  They debated what to name this surprise baby girl.  Robyn...   Allison... Lindsey.... Robyn- no that's too bird like..... Tyler...  Elisabeth.... Robyn.  Tough choices!  So I would just be Little Johnson for a while.  Well, I was pretty good at a couple things right off the bat.  Sleeping, eating, getting lost and scaring my mother.  It took the nurses 3 hours to build up the courage to visit Momma's room and ask if she by chance knew of my whereabouts.  "Mrs. Johnson (pregnant pause...pregnant pause), do you have the baby?"  Do you think she held her breath waiting for that answer?  I guess the greatest question I've always wondered, what if my mom had said No!?  Well, my mother knew where I was but was rather concerned at the length of time they waited to confront her about kind of a big issue.
In those three precious hours before Pops had to return me to nursery for who knows what, my mother determined something that would be a life long truth.  The conversation went a little something like this.
"Husband.."
"Yes my glorious wife?"
"This one scares me"
giggle. giggle.  "Oh that's ridiculous!  She's a tiny helpless infant!  What could possibly be scary about her!?"
"I don't know! I just have this feeling. This one is going to be trouble.  She just has this look in her eye.  She's going smile at us and turn around and do whatever she wants to."
Seems this woman was on her game and on to mine.  Unfortunately, while this little factoid was caught early, it could not save any of us from the shenanigans that make up my life.  All I can say is... Sorry Mom and Pop, but you made me.  :)

The Nazi's are Coming!

OK OK! Before you freak out, let me start with some back-story!

When we were little,  my mom's little brother, Uncle Tracy and his wife; Aunt Lisa lived two hours away from us.  It made for some fabulous memories and weekends!  While Aunt Lisa and Uncle Tracy have 7 beautiful babies,  the memories I have are of the 4 oldest.  They eventually moved to Germany leaving our relationships to hand written letters and homemade friendship bracelets.  Marie, Matthew,  LuLu and Emma.  Together with J Bean, E and myself we didn't need much entertainment other than a front or backyard and the occasional meal.

Small tangent! My Dad is somewhat of a history encyclopedia.  Ask him what happened on a specific day and he could spout off a list of ten things and then wonder why you couldn't do the same.  I'm still certain that if he went on Jeopardy he’d be a winner.  One does not become an encyclopedia without the help of reading and watching LOTS of history channel. This means WE got to watch a lot of history channel!

The combination of weekends together and the history channel seemed to be the perfect recipe for the creation of the perpetual game of the Nazi’s are coming!  Somehow 7 children and 2 dads ended up in the living room watching a riveting documentary about Nazi Germany while the Momma's made dinner.  I don't remember anything I learned from what I watched about the Nazi's I do remember the 7 of us doing our best to reenact history.  Marie and Jillian would usually be the frightened mother's of LuLu, Me, baby Emma and E.  Matthew would be a Nazi.  At first it started as a glorified neighborhood game of hide and seek.  But as the weeks progressed the plot would change.

On the particular game day of this vivid memory we were at my house in Pleasanton.  Our parents sent us outside to play in the yard.  We met in the garage to set the premise for the day's game.  All of us would be running from the Nazi's today and it was the middle of winter.  We dressed up to go out in the pretend "bitta cold." We prepped the little red wagon with blankets and put all our babies and scraps of food to take on our journey through the streets in search of refuge.  We lived on a fairly long street and were lucky enough to grow up knowing almost all of our neighbors who seemed to be pretty tolerant of the noisy children always playing outside.  

The 7 of us set off down the street yelling on the top of our lungs "The Nazi's are coming!  The Nazi's are coming!" Warning all the neighbors, I mean towns people of the arrival.  Bushes became cellars and woods while neighbors became the Nazi's.  Good old friendly Fritz, I know what you're thinking, this has GOT to be a made up name of your neighbor.  No! No! This is really his name.  Well, Fritz was outside gardening and the teenaged boy who lived next door was washing his car.  On the one hand, they might have thought it was funny.  There is also the great possibility they wondered what on earth we were watching on TV!  All I know is to this day I laugh every time I think about it.  Here’s a pretty picture. 7 barefoot children dressed in baby blankets and bonnets,  running down the streets of Pleasanton, CA in the 90’s with a wagon full of dolls, pretending to be in an era of terror and mass genocide.  I am forever grateful for my understanding neighbors and parents for providing an environment that was conducive to pretend scary rather than real.

The Beginning

Whoop Whoop!  Early last week I was cordially invited to pinterest!  I mean after that miracle I thought, hey why not go all the way and so I invited myself to the blogging world!  I know, I know,  I was a little slow getting here but I'm pretty stoked to take anyone who wants to come along on a journey to the "olden" days.  MY "olden" days.  Now, I'm not assuming that this blog will travel far. However, my sister started her blog a few years ago and has readers in Korea, and Egypt so who really knows...  Anywho. So the J Bean and I were chit chatting in her kitchen a few nights ago about the silliness we used to get ourselves into.  I brought up a story about Barbie’s, which lead to the good old "olden" days.  I guess it would be pretty appropriate to begin with the story that lead me to tears and the idea of writing these memories.


But first let me introduce the MAIN characters!

Pops/ Daddy/ Dad/ Big Wave Dave- Born in the 50's to a VERY Scandinavian woman.  Raised by a single mom and grew up in Long Beach California and met my mama in high school.  SO CUTE!  Even cuter, he "hated the cold at Valparasio University" so much he ended up going to CSULB. I'm pretty convinced it's so he could be closer to my mom.  Started his successful CPA business in 1988. Health NUT.  Best Daddy I've ever had!

Mama/ Mom /Mommeeee!- Born 50's and welcomed home by a mother, father, 2 older brothers, an older sister and would welcome the 5th and final brother into the home 2 years later.  Grew up in Long beach California to a show biz family kind of like (the mini Osman's). Beautiful singer, fabulous mother and the STRONGEST woman I have ever met.  Worked in corporate America for several years before becoming a full time Mommy.

Meggie- Australian Sheppard mutt.  Mama and Pop's first-born puppy.  She made sure the rents would be able to handle to responsibility of parenting.  Thanks for letting them practice Meggers!

Barbie/ J Bean/ Hill/ Jill/ Vivviann/ Julian/ Tyler David - Born in 80's and was able to obtain 6 solid years of the 80's before getting to grow up in the 90's!!! Born to be Mom of the year.  Fabulous singer, dancer, student, friend, actress, athlete, stunningly beautiful, etc.   They were a cute little fam bam of three and considered staying that way.  For those of you that know her dear son Jacob, much like his mother cannot be the only child! So Mom and Pop decided she needed a playmate! Enter ME!

Me/Tyler David the 2nd/ A Little Lindsey/ Ra-Ra/ Byn/ Nybor - Conceived on J beans second birthday!  Yup, that just happened. Another 80's baby. Your typical middle child. Stubborn, strong willed instigator and born to be trouble.  Prayed nightly for my baby brother to come until the ‘rents told me that in fact “we” were preggers.  Enter E.

E/ Magic Johnson/ Uncle Ethan/ Shupae- 90's baby!  Poor kid couldn't catch a break due to his 3 moms lurking over his EVERY movement.  Stubborn, silly and VERY smart.  He's very much the product of being the baby boy.  


Now that the main characters have been mentioned let the olden day stories begin!